Articles by Douglas Winslow Cooper

“Love makes the world go around.” And around. And around. In this first, dizzy phase of what might be a lifelong relationship, it is hard to think clearly, but we must.

Love that moves on to marriage, must also move on to loyalty and devotion, but too often does not, leaving behind broken hearts, broken marriages, broken children. The wise will “begin with the end in mind,” thinking beyond the initial stage to the middle and the end stages of a committed relationship.

Yes, 2012 is a leap year, so we have an extra day to accomplish what we hope to get done this year, an extra day to appreciate what we already have. This extra day, February 29th, is also the back-up date [the “snow date”] for my book-signing talk, “Love in a Leap Year,” at the Wallkill River [NY] School of Art. Chosen by the lecture series director, the title has made me wonder: do we “fall” in love or do we “leap”? First, I fell. Twenty years later, I leaped.

New Year’s Day is often symbolized by a new-born baby. The outgoing year is symbolized by an old man, perhaps prematurely aged by parenthood.

A member of our Lake Osiris Homeowners Association sent me an email indicating that a certain home by our lake was “not surprisingly” up for sale. Intrigued, given the slowness of the current retail market, I asked why it was not surprising. He responded that the couple had broken up shortly after the birth of their first child last year. A pity, but not rare.

“Don’t get married, unless…” I told my son, now 30, handsome, smart, tall, successful, considerate, a prize. I’ll get to the “unless” part later.

I was sorry to read, in asiancemagazine.com, of which I am very fond, some college student commenters defending the practice of buying term papers and passing them off as their own. Not only does that cheat the institution they attend, it cheats the other students and cheats the cheater himself. Let me explain.

One good reason to be at a university is the opportunity to meet, perhaps eventually marry, someone with whom you are compatible, somewhat similar to you, but different enough to be interesting. Even when this does not happen, dating is instructive.

In my book, "Ting and I", the dating and mating process was modeled as follows:

“It occurs to me that during the dating phase of our lives we get to know well, say, a dozen potential spouses, more or less. We hope to pick one and mate for life.

Why are couples with a Caucasian male and an Asian female relatively common? There has been much discussion of this in Asiance Magazine, which is “connecting Asian American women to the world.” I will approach this issue cautiously, telling you why one Caucasian male, “Doug,” loves one Chinese American female, “Ting,” Tina Su Cooper, my wife. It is one side of one story, but I think it has some broader validity.